The bigger Z gets, the more I realize how corny her sense of humor is – and how hilarious I find it.
Z: Amma, do you know who Sheikh Mohammad is?
Me: I do. But why don’t you tell me and remind me, anyway.
Z: Sheikh Mohammad is the ruler of Dubai.
Me: Oh yeah, that’s right!
Z: Do you know what Sheikh Mohammad does?
Me: No, jaan. What does he do?
Z: Sheikh Mohammad shakes!
*cue crazy giggling and rolling on the floor*
It’s amazing how Z always wants my help when cleaning up her messes but never while creating them.
Before tonight, I’d always feel sorry for her and help her clean up but I finally put my foot down. Told her I couldn’t help her clean up because she hadn’t needed my help when making the mess.
Thought it’d prove too much for her and I’d have to eventually pitch in because my room resembled a war zone. But apparently not. Boy, have I been misjudging her clean up skills all these months!
My room is now clean… by a 3 year old’s standards at least.
20 newspaper sheets – which she’d spread all over the floor, have been folded.
Her toys have been collected in her favourite gift bags and are neatly lined up against the wall.
Her cars have been parked (albeit in the middle of the room).
Her stuff toys are back in the cot.
And her “makeup” has gone back in its case.
I can walk in my room without stubbing my toe, breaking something, or strangling a stuff toy.
Hoorah for small victories in the parenthood war.
Ever since school started, I’ve been having a lot of trouble getting Z to finish her lunch.
She doesn’t eat any breakfast because she gets motion sickness and throws up in her bus if she does. I’ve been going crazy worrying about her since some days, she’d go more than 12 hours without food or milk!
I tried cajoling, scolding and bargaining but nothing worked.
Yesterday, I told her the day she finishes her entire lunch in school, I’d be the happiest Amma in the world.
It was an offhand remark I wasn’t even sure she heard. But apparently she did because today her lunch box was empty!
This was after I’d cooked more pasta than I meant to so I’d told her she only needed to finish half.
Z has also told me she’ll finish her entire lunch tomorrow too.
Needless to say, I’m the happiest Amma in the world today.
The ways this girl steals my heart…
As cliched as it sounds, time flies.
In case you’re wondering, I’ve spent the past few years documenting life with Z on Facebook. Maintaining a blog was just too much of a hassle.
What I recently realized though is that everything I’ve posted – all my little Z nuggets and personal musing are owned by Facebook because that’s where I published them. They could disappear tomorrow if Facebook shuts down. What a depressing thought!
In case I’m too lazy to say something, I’ll be posting my old posts from Facebook on this blog. But lately, I’ve had these urges of getting back into personal blogging. My opinions demand it. Little buggers.
It’s such a rush to know that Z thinks she can conquer the world with me at her side. Every time M tells her he’ll leave her behind if she doesn’t stop crying/calm down/change clothes/etc before going out, her first question is, “Will amma stay back too?”
If the answer’s yes, her expression changes from worried to “bring it on” in a span of a second.
Nothing feels better than being that person for your daughter.
(M of course is fast learning ways to avoid that question.)
I watched ‘The Lovely Bones’ last night. If you’re a parent and haven’t watched it, I strongly suggest you do. It might seem an inappropriate statement given the subject matter but it’s a beautiful movie.
It’s disturbing. It’s heart breaking. It’s real.
I stayed up watching over Z for a long while afterwards. I wanted to put her back in my womb; keep her safe from even the idea of evil.
Instead I gave her my finger to hold. When she squeezed it, I realized it was I who needed the contact more. I needed the reassurance of her life. Of her safety.
What I really wanted to do was wrap my arms around her and hold her tight against my heart.
And when she wailed in her sleep as I watched over her, I did just that.
Quotes from the movie that stayed with me:
- There was one thing my murderer didn’t understand; he didn’t understand how much a father could love his child.
- My murderer was a man from our neighborhood. I took his photo once; he stepped out of nowhere and ruined the shot. He ruined a lot of things.
- The days were unchanging and every night I dream the same dream. The smell of damp earth. The scream no one heard. The sound of my heart beating like a hammer against cloth and I would hear them calling.
Source: IMDB (The Lovely Bones page)
I can’t thank Allah (swt) enough for his blessings. I gave birth to a healthy, beautiful baby girl 4 months ago, my part time freelancing is going well and I’m at peace with myself. Mommy-hood is treating me well. I have doubts (and plenty of guilt!) over how I’m treating Z though. Patience is not my strongest point as a mom.
I probably should write down my birth story and save it for when Z is about to become a mum in 20+ years. It’s pretty hilarious in a ‘I can’t believe they didn’t tell me the sex of my baby after birth’. Yeah, I had to ask – and even then they got it wrong the first time. And we’re talking post birth!
There I was, all ready to faint from fatigue, waiting to hear if I had a girl or a boy so I could pass out in peace and no one thinks to tell me.
I had to actually ask ‘Is it a boy or a girl?’
‘It’s a boy!’ came the reply. I only just registered the slight disappointment at not having a girl and was thanking Allah for a healthy baby boy when –
‘No wait, it’s a girl!’
I’ve been a fast walker all my life. I outpaced most people and my dad liked walking with me because he didn’t have to slow down to match my pace.
At university it used to irritate me no end to realize my friends had lagged behind, and it irritated them no end that I couldn’t walk slow or keep pace with them.
In the end we worked out a compromise. I’d walk my pace and they walked theirs. I would reach our destination early while they were still a good 5 minutes away. So I’d buy chai at the cafeteria, sit and enjoy my cuppa while they caught up with me.
Of course walking fast and reaching first meant I had to give their orders as well so that by the time they got to me their fries would be ready :)
Soon after getting pregnant I realized I’d become a slow walker eventually and not just for the duration of my pregnancy but for life!
How so? First, I started walking slow because I couldn’t afford a stumble or a fall. Then I had to walk slow because my center of gravity changed and at best my balance was precarious. At this point, I can’t even get up from a chair or bed fast let alone be able to walk fast! The big tummy gets in the way.
Once I’ll give birth, I’ll be walking slow because I’ll have a baby in my arms, then I’ll be walking slow because I’ll have a toddler with me. After that I’ll be deemed a slow walker because my kid would be out pacing me.
Sigh, I’m never going to be a fast walker again.
I knew my friends were planning to throw me a baby shower and I figured out when it would be. My friends, God bless them couldn’t contain their excitement and made slips and they’re not the most authentic liars ;)
What I didn’t figure out was the effort they’d put in to make my surprise baby shower the most memorable thing of my pregnancy!
The second I saw the “Mom to bee” banner on the door, I knew I’d arrived at my shower. What waited for me behind that door was completely beyond my imagination! What was a “I know what’s awaiting me”, turned into “Omg, I can’t believe this!” within seconds.
I’d figured on yummy food, gifts and plenty of good wishes along with the great time we always have when we get together. I got all of that and much, much more. I got the cutest Honest Bee themed party ever thrown! A “Mom to bee” banner (which is hanging on the wall in front of my work desk as I write this), a t-shirt with the same slogan stitched on it, fairy lights and more banners!
That wasn’t all. The food looked brilliant – all colorful and creative, the cutlery matched the Orange and Yellow theme of the party. Even the spoons had little bees stamped on them!
It was quite a coincidence that I ended up wearing yellow and orange too! (That truly was a coincidence guys, I had no idea you guys were putting a theme to the baby shower!)
All in all, my friends were successful in surprising me. It was overwhelming to have so much love and attention showered on me.
Oh and the gifts I got were so perfect! A prenatal massage for myself and my baby’s first ever toys!
The euphoria of today refuses to die down and I’m still too excited to sleep.
It’s somehow a relief to know that somethings haven’t changed. While almost everything about my life and routine has been taken over by the pregnancy, I can still sleep like a log when I’m stressed.
Last night’s sleep was one of the best I’ve had this trimester. The back ache and swollen feet didn’t register. I didn’t get uncomfortable enough to wake up and managed to change sides only when I had to get up to go to the loo.
The loo trips only happened thrice too – instead of the usual 5 or 6, in half of which I have to walk holding onto the furniture for support.
But since the pain didn’t register, I could simply get up and go with minimum hassle.
The baby cooperated too. There was no rib tickling or kicks on my bladder. There was no crazy movements to wake me up. Just a little shove here and there to let me know it was okay when I’d get up to go to the loo.
Of course I won’t be able to sleep off stress when there’s a hungry, squalling baby in the crib in the middle of the night.
Just a little over 3 weeks left!